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8 Ways to Preserve Unity During a Disagreement

I’ve always wanted to be a good husband. I’ve found, though, that marriage cannot truly be a blessing if my wife and I don’t handle disagreement well. Here are a few lessons I’ve learned that have allowed our marriage not only to endure disagreement, but also to flourish in spite of it.

8 Ways to Preserve Unity During a Disagreement

1. It’s not About Being Right or Wrong; It’s About Being One.

Our goal must never be to “win an argument”; rather, it should be to seek reconciliation and unity.

2. In Disagreement, give your spouse the benefit of the doubt.

When your spouse acts out of character, remind yourself that this isn’t normal behavior. Instead of choosing to retaliate, offer grace and seek to find out the root issue. Overreacting disrupts the opportunity for unity.

3. Affirm Your Spouse’s Feelings.

Regardless of whether or not you understand why your spouse is hurt, always seek to see their point of view and validate it. A surefire way to disrupt unity is to make your spouse feel ridiculous or stupid for feeling the way they do.

4. Apologize – Wholeheartedly.

Half an apology is really no apology at all. We can’t fool our spouses into thinking a fake apology is authentic.

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Chuck Lawlesshttp://chucklawless.com/
Chuck Lawless currently serves as Professor of Evangelism and Missions and Dean of Graduate Studies at Southeastern Seminary. You can connect with Dr. Lawless on Twitter @Clawlessjr and on at facebook.com/CLawless.