stay

Staying Power: 5 Signs Your Marriage Will Make It

People often ask us, how can I tell if my marriage will have staying power? In some cases, it may not be...
sex life

Sex Life Feel Broken? How to Rebuild It!

Today a reader is asking, “how do you reset your sex life?” What if it’s been really difficult in the past, but now...

How to Stop a Financial Fight Before it Starts

This is an excerpt from Cherie and Brian Lowe’s  book, Your Money, Your Marriage, about how to avoid a financial fight.  Everyday after school, I...
disagreement

8 Ways to Preserve Unity During a Disagreement

I’ve always wanted to be a good husband. But I’ve found marriage can't truly be a blessing if my wife and I don’t handle disagreement well.
fighting about money

Stop Fighting About Money – 10 Ways Forward

Fighting about money is the number one predictor of divorce, so having a game plan going into financial discussions is a crucial part of...
tough times

Four Comforting Truths to Remember in Tough Times

Do the hard work during tough times. In the process both of you will become closer to the best version of who God made your marriage will be.
change

Husbands: God Doesn’t Want You to Change Your Wife

God has not called you to change your wife. Instead, He has commanded you to love her as Christ loves the church.
stop being a doormat

How (and When) to Stop Being a Doormat

Sometimes we get in a rut in marriage where we actually hurt our spouses because we enable sin. Sometimes we need to learn how to stop being a doormat.
anger

Is It Way Too Easy for Your Husband to Push Your Anger Button?

If we want to get emotionally healthy, with ourselves and with others, we need to be willing to go below the surface of our anger.

All Marriage is Difficult – Here’s Why

If my wife and I have learned one thing in our marriage, it is how to sin against each other. This is why marriage is difficult -- for everyone.
obstacles to forgiveness

3 Obstacles to Forgiveness, And How to Fight Them

Imagine this scenario: Your spouse/partner has wounded you in some way. S/he has now expressed what feels like genuine remorse to you. Maybe...
control

Trying to Control Your Spouse is Toxic

Trying to control someone—in marriage, parenting, the church, or government—is evil. The Bible recognizes authority, but it takes a strong stand against control. If...
little annoyances

How to Minimize Marriage’s Little Annoyances.

Minimize the Little Annoyances in Marriage It’s obvious there are some marriage issues that are so big they cannot be ignored. Left unresolved,...
angry

Angry Spouses: Here’s 1 Way To Change Today.

Editor's Note: this post does not apply to abusive situations. If you are being physically, emotionally, or psychologically abused remove yourself from...
struggles

Don’t Run From the Struggles You’re Facing

Mature Christians recognize and appreciate the sweet side of suffering. Teresa of Avila wrote, “Lord, how you afflict your lovers! But everything...
forgiveness myths

5 Forgiveness Myths That Keep Spouses Apart.

Forgiveness has a lot of misconceptions and myths. Matthew and Amanda were stuck. Amanda was angry with Matthew and kept bringing up the...
fight fair

You Can Fight Well If You Fight Fair. Here’s How.

You and your spouse have had an argument. You want to talk it out, but your spouse retreats. What do you do?...
high sex drive

10 Questions High Sex Drive Spouses Should Ask

Are you the high sex drive husband, and you’re wondering what to do because your wife rarely wants sex? We opened the week...
attunement

Attunement: This Odd Word Can Save Your Marriage

  Have you ever gotten into a big fight with your spouse and not handled it very well? I don’t think I know...
heart of the matter

The Heart Is The Heart Of The Matter. How’s Yours?

Whenever a marriage self-destructs, the heart is the heart of the matter. In Proverbs 4:23, wise King Solomon offers a vivid picture of the...
explosions

Marriage-Ruining Explosions Start As Small Sins

I was shooting baskets in my Pacific Northwest boyhood home in 1980 when a gigantic plume of smoke way off in the...
little annoyances

Don’t Let Little Annoyances Become Huge Problems

It’s obvious there are some marriage issues that are so big they cannot be ignored. Left unresolved, these large and painful issues can...
helping

When Helping Isn’t Helping You OR Your Spouse

The scene is a couple driving in the car on the way to dinner:Silence for several minutes.“What’s wrong?”“Nothing.”A few more minutes of...
imperfect

How to Unconditionally Love An Imperfect Spouse

Chet was being a jerk at a family gathering and a relative called him out on it. On the way home, he...
tie-breaker

Husbands Don’t Need To Be The “Tie-Breaker”

When we give husbands "tie-breaker" power, do we end up damaging intimacy? Often the best conversations on this blog don’t happen in the...
hurt your spouse

What To Do When You’ve Hurt Your Spouse

Have you ever hurt your spouse in some way? All right, so it’s a trick question. Of course you have hurt your...
thinking

Are You Thinking About What You’re Thinking?

If we want a healthy marriage, if we want a marriage that is marked by cherishing, we have to think about what we...
disguise

Take Off The Disguise When You’re With Your Spouse

The Pharisees, who loved money, heard all this and were sneering at Jesus. He said to them, “You are the ones who...
morning person

My Spouse Is (Or Isn’t) a Morning Person. Help Me!

Before I set the bar of my marriage at cherishing my wife, I thought I had run into an unsolvable conundrum. It had to do...
healing

Healing From Your Past Is Hard. It’s Also Worth It.

Tina and I met together for counseling several years ago to work through some traumatic experiences from her past. A year after...
fresh start

It’s Never Too Late For a Fresh Start.

A story is told about a factory burning down that was owned and managed by the great inventor Thomas Edison, and the...
mental load

Husbands, Help Carry Your Wife’s Mental Load.

It’s the last day of our emotional labor and mental load series! We wrapped up the big teaching points yesterday talking about how...
imperfect

All Marriages Are Imperfect. And All Can Improve.

“You know, your prayers are pretty shallow. Why don’t you pray a real prayer?” The young man was reeling—was she really going to leave him...
level of conflict

What Level of Conflict Are Your Marital Fights At?

  Ryan and Megan were in our living room and they couldn’t agree. Ryan’s friends were going to get together over the weekend...
toxic

Toxic People Can Poison a Fruitful Marriage

When I start writing a book, I wear the hat of an explorer. I have a general destination in mind, but I...
stress

How to Fight Off Stress While Stuck Inside

I haven’t left the house for over a week as my wife and I stay at home to stop the spread of...
survival

4 Ways to Navigate Covid-19: A Survival Guide

Life in 2020 is filled with concerns about health, jobs, and the economy. Yet your most worrisome problem right now might not be...
anxiety

Anxiety Doesn’t Always Win: Finding Joy In Stress

Anxiety plagues many of us, stealing our peace of mind, but also inserting itself into our marriages. And that can cause some real...
loop of conflict

Marriages that Last Close the “Loop of Conflict”

Most of us start our marriages in that blissful, love-filled state we had while dating. But all too often that close relationship...
tired

Tired of All the Fighting? Maybe You’re Just Tired!

Because I like you I’ll let you in on a little secret . . . sometimes Rich and I fight.  Sometimes we...
forgiveness

6 Ways Forgiveness Isn’t What You Think It is.

Forgiveness can be costly. A major step in the process of forgiveness is releasing your offending spouse, giving up on revenge and...
newlyweds

The 4 Common Mistakes Newlyweds Make

Just about every day for the last 14 years I’ve given my life to helping pre-married and newlyweds prepare for and start...
reconciliation

Ruthlessly Pursue Reconciliation With Your Spouse

Caveat: This blog post is for those in relatively healthy, perhaps difficult, but not abusive relationships. I was five thousand miles away, in...
household chores

Household Chores Can Make or Break a Marriage

It’s an argument as old as marriage: Who helps out most with household chores? In a recent survey, more than half of...
adventure

Don’t Avoid Conflict, Treat it Like an Adventure.

Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it. –1 Peter 3:10-11 (NLT) Personally, I hate conflict....
character trait

A Negative Character Trait CAN Change. Here’s How.

Is it fair to say to your spouse, “This is just the way I am” when it comes to a negative character...
depression

How to Love a Spouse Struggling with Depression

So, as a loving husband or wife, what do you do if you feel like your spouse is being swallowed up by depression?...
negative emotion

Negative Emotion is Vital For a Healthy Relationship

In preparation for my shiny new blog plan (month long themes complete with corresponding love experiments, social media posts and podcast episodes),...
argument

Marriage Fight Club: How to Have a Good Argument

It’s not a matter of if, but when, you and your mate will have an argument. It’s a natural part of any...
in-laws

In-Laws An Issue? Here’s What To Do About It.

The holidays can be a wonderful time of laughter and love and gatherings with family. But it can also be a time...