fighting fair

7 Rules for Fighting Fair

Today's post is full of that "well yeah, of course" sort of practical advice that I immediately forget the moment things get tense at...

There Are Some Problems You Can’t Solve

John Gottman, one of the top marriage researchers, estimates that 69% of marital conflicts are perpetual. That means that couples will have the same...

4 Steps Toward a “Chore War” Ceasefire

Do you and your spouse fight over day-to-day household chores? It's time to declare a ceasefire! Today's great post comes from Kathi Lipp, and...
selfishness

Selfishness is the #1 Threat to Your Marriage’s Health

Often cited as the number one problem is the lack of communication. I don’t believe that’s the case. I believe there's a deeper problem.
help

Sometimes Your Spouse Doesn’t Want Your Help. Here’s Why.

In married life we can misread and overstep our bounds. Even when this is under the umbrella of trying to help, beware...
types of conflict

3 Types of Conflict in Marriage: Don’t Confuse Them!

I think types of conflicts in marriage can be divided into three different root causes, and each should be handled differently.
hurt your spouse

What To Do When You’ve Hurt Your Spouse

Have you ever hurt your spouse in some way? All right, so it’s a trick question. Of course you have hurt your...

Discovering Your Conflict Style, and How to Improve It

It's a beautiful day, the kind that beckons you to drop what you're doing inside and head outside. So you may do something that...

The Surprising Secret for Marital Satisfaction

Today's post comes from Gary Thomas. Some desires in marriage are never going to be fulfilled and need to be “crucified.” In fact, various studies have...
stop fighting

5 Easy Ways to Stop Fighting With Your Spouse

Stop fighting with your spouse…if only it were so simple! Let’s face it…communication is very complex.
how to resolve conflict

Want to Know How to Resolve Conflict With Your Spouse? Turn It Into a...

Now that we’re empty nesters, Lisa travels with me on most of my trips, at least the pleasant ones. Winnipeg in February? Pass. New York...
depression

How to Love a Spouse Struggling with Depression

So, as a loving husband or wife, what do you do if you feel like your spouse is being swallowed up by depression?...
forgiveness myths

5 Forgiveness Myths That Keep Spouses Apart.

Forgiveness has a lot of misconceptions and myths. Matthew and Amanda were stuck. Amanda was angry with Matthew and kept bringing up the...

Abuse: More Than Just a Black Eye

A warning up front: today's post is about the different kinds of abuse that happen in a marriage. Sadly, statistics show that in our...
I was wrong

Why Saying “I Was Wrong” Will Transform Your Marriage

If you are old enough to recall the sitcom Happy Days, you’ll remember “The Fonz.” Henry Winkler played the character of Arthur Fonzarelli, the coolest...
love & respect

Why The Hugely Popular Book “Love & Respect” Could Be Harmful to Your Sex...

When I was first married, sex hurt. And I felt terribly guilty about that. Have you ever looked back on your younger self...
tough love

3 Tough Love Truths About Your Marriage

A lay counselor who has worked with hundreds of premarital couples told me that he particularly looks forward to the session when...
stress

How to Fight Off Stress While Stuck Inside

I haven’t left the house for over a week as my wife and I stay at home to stop the spread of...

3 Tips to a Stronger Marriage, One Day at a Time

Choose a path. Every action we take, or choose not to take, puts us on a path. The same goes for our beliefs. All of...

Sometimes “Don’t Go to Bed Angry” is Terrible Advice

There's a scene in the Bill Murray movie Groundhog Day where Bill yells at a groundhog "don't drive angry!" (it makes more sense in...
family origin impacts marriage

How Your Family of Origin Impacts Your Marriage Now

The term family of origin is familiar to some but many not everyone.  Everyone should have an understanding of it, being that...
accept your spouse

Accept Your Spouse As They Are, Even When Who They Are Changes

People change. Very few of us have the same figure or physique we had on our wedding day as we walked down...
jealousy

Jealousy Isn’t Always Unhealthy

You feel jealousy when you experience the unpleasant sensation of a rival. No matter how much your spouse may attempt to reassure...
tie-breaker

Husbands Don’t Need To Be The “Tie-Breaker”

When we give husbands "tie-breaker" power, do we end up damaging intimacy? Often the best conversations on this blog don’t happen in the...
marriage

3 Antidotes to Disappointment in Your Marriage

Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love. Ephesians 4:2 Unless you really married...
fighting about money

Stop Fighting About Money – 10 Ways Forward

Fighting about money is the number one predictor of divorce, so having a game plan going into financial discussions is a crucial part of...
happy marriage

Want a Happy Marriage? Stop Asking Your Spouse to Do This.

Don’t you think it would be cruel to ask your spouse to hold down five jobs? Let’s say your...
love is a choice

What to Do When You’re Not Feeling It

What do you do when you're not feeling it? Most marriages go through this. You might not want to hear it, but love is a choice.
character trait

A Negative Character Trait CAN Change. Here’s How.

Is it fair to say to your spouse, “This is just the way I am” when it comes to a negative character...
struggles

Don’t Run From the Struggles You’re Facing

Mature Christians recognize and appreciate the sweet side of suffering. Teresa of Avila wrote, “Lord, how you afflict your lovers! But everything...
perfectionist

What To Do When Your Spouse is a Perfectionist

Today's post comes from Beth Steffaniak and our friends at Homeword. Check out their site for tons of resources for your family.  How to Handle a Perfectionistic Spouse The...
confrontation in marriage

How to Win Every Confrontation in Your Marriage

When it comes to confrontation in marriage, I have a rule of thumb that has proved itself to be true over and over again: The...
fight

Want to Stop a Fight Before It Starts? Here’s How!

Do you sometimes feel the frustration simmering below the surface? Can you sense there might be an argument brewing? Let us encourage...
conflict

Conflict and Fighting Aren’t the Same Thing. Here’s Why That Matters.

I’ve shared with you in past blog posts that my husband, Mike, and I are very, very different. Early in our marriage,...
toxic

Toxic People Can Poison a Fruitful Marriage

If we value fruitfulness as Jesus does, then literally, all of us need to weed out the toxic relationships that are around our marriage.

One Question You Should Ask Before You Fight With Your Spouse

If you’ve been married for a few months (heck, a few days) you’ve probably been in a situation or conversation when you find yourself...

The Surprising Reason You’re Angry at Your Spouse Today

Okay some of you aren't angry TODAY, but you were yesterday, or will be tomorrow. This great post from America's Family Coaches explains how...
marriage

How Married Do You Want to Be?

How earnestly do you want to feel close to your spouse? Enough to kill something for it?
how to love

The Greatest Gift Marriage Offers Us Isn’t What You Think

Today's post from Gary Thomas is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. We think marriage is a place to receive...
punishment

Punishment Is Not An Acceptable Relational Tool

Punishment is connected to our instinctive reactions to pain. (In fact, the word “pain” comes from the same root word as “punishment.”)...
imperfect

How to Unconditionally Love An Imperfect Spouse

Chet was being a jerk at a family gathering and a relative called him out on it. On the way home, he...

5 Soothing Tips for Making Up After Conflict

Today's post is from our friends over at loveandlifetoolbox.com.    Not many people actually enjoy conflict. Whether it’s a fight with a friend, a rift with...

How to Survive When Your Marriage is Under Attack

Today's post comes from Live Your Best Marriage. In a few weeks my husband and I will celebrate our 25th Wedding Anniversary. It’s been an exciting...
married sex

How Bad Married Sex Can Actually Be Good For You!

Steve meets Michelle. They fall in love and get married shortly after graduation. For our story...
close the loop

Close the Loop: The One Vital Habit That Will Keep Your Marriage Moving Forward

The moment you do or say something that hurts your marriage partner, you stand at a fork in the road. Whether you...
adventure

Don’t Avoid Conflict, Treat it Like an Adventure.

Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it. –1 Peter 3:10-11 (NLT) Personally, I hate conflict....
angry

Angry Spouses: Here’s 1 Way To Change Today.

Editor's Note: this post does not apply to abusive situations. If you are being physically, emotionally, or psychologically abused remove yourself from...
choice paralysis struggling marriage

The Danger of ‘Choice Paralysis’ When Your Marriage is Struggling

Today's post comes from Gary Thomas and is an adaptation from his new book Loving Him Well: Practical Advice for Influencing Your Husband. While the...
tough times

Four Comforting Truths to Remember in Tough Times

Do the hard work during tough times. In the process both of you will become closer to the best version of who God made your marriage will be.
sex life

Sex Life Feel Broken? How to Rebuild It!

Today a reader is asking, “how do you reset your sex life?” What if it’s been really difficult in the past, but now...