Is it selfish, sinful, or unspiritual to take care of yourself? Yes, if you are completely unbalanced and care only for yourself in a narcissistic, self-centered way, but that isn’t the problem most people in difficult relationships have. Instead, they give too much.
It isn’t selfish to care for yourself; it is necessary and essential. The Apostle Paul was telling husbands how to love their wives. He used the following argument: “Husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body” (Ephesians 5:28-29, NIV). He is saying it is natural to nurture yourself. There isn’t anything wrong with it at all. In fact, he is telling the husbands that all they have to do to love their wives is to take care of their wives just like they take care of themselves.
…Learn how to do the following:
- Get your mental, emotional, spiritual, and relational needs met.
Determine whether you should put your own need or someone else’s need first.
Establish priorities for your life.
Overcome false guilt that drives you to people-please.
Choose what you want to do for others rather than doing things for the wrong motives.